This last weekend Stephen and I celebrated our one year anniversary! We spent the whole day Saturday driving around like we were on a road trip and eating the best Mexican and Italian food we’ve ever had in San Diego. It was a much needed date since we haven’t gone on one since our son was born and the last few we’ve had I was miserably pregnant.
Stephen and I met 7 years ago and dated for 2 years. We spent much of our waking days with one another and seriously thought we knew everything about each other! We definitely knew a lot but during our couple years away we both have changed and have had to get to know each other again and it’s been quite an adventure, not to mention marriage is always different than dating. Here are 10 things I’ve learned this last year:
- Blending families is tough. Or if you marry later in life, or you married really young, or too soon, or with kids or without kids. Marriage is just tougher than our ideal of what it’ll be like.
- What ever thoughts you nurture about your spouse will be the way you start perceiving them to be. If you think about all the negative and the things that bother you, they’ll start to annoy you more but if you focus on their strengths and think about the positive you’ll see the good.
- If you’ve got young kids and you want to…you have to schedule it in. That’s all I’m going to say on that one.
- Dates are important or else the person you’re married to starts feeling like a roommate. I resist this one for some reason, probably because I hate trying to find a babysitter.
- Having defined roles works for us. I have an aunt who says her husband makes the money and she spends it and I first thought it was silly and ‘poor husband’ but now I get it and it really works best for us that way too. It makes things much less complicated when you only have one spender. Only I like to say he makes the money and I work at stretching the dollar.
- Sometimes your spouse seems crazy…sometimes they think you’re nuts!
- You need a spouse who finds you lovable, even when you feel you aren’t. It makes the world of a difference when there is forgiveness and seeking to understand.
- One on one dates with kids are important too. If you want to make sure everyone feels needed and important, taking time to do one on one with everyone in the family really helps.
- Laughing is important…laughing at the appropriate time is important too. I think I’ve almost got the one down now.
- Marriage only works if you’re married to your best friend.
I love you Stephen! Here’s to many many more years.
I’m going to attempt blogging again. I have blogged on and off since I think 2010. Then I believe back in 2013 I finally figured out my niche, what I’m truly passionate about: simplifying. Having a desire to simplify stems from feeling overwhelmed with the constant distractions and excess we have in our modern society. So I created Simplicity In All Things to blog about people I admired that were simplifying their lives and to document my own journey to do the same.
But since 2010 I have gone through some major transitions. I now am married with two children and the whole idea of blogging really had to be put on the back burner for some time to get through all my crazy transitions.
Since my son was born this July I seriously feel like my belongings have doubled and I want to document my declutter process and share it here. Plus in the last couple of years I feel I’ve become less mindful and more in survival mode. So I’m on a personal mission to make my life more simple, more meaningful, and more enjoyable and I’d love for you to join me.
To start off this new chapter of my life, I thought it very appropriate to write a declaration for myself. What I see my life purpose as, how I want to think, feel, what kind of people I want to be around, and what kind of person I want to become. Everyday I will read my declaration to myself, out loud because I believe in manifesting how your life will turn out. I have already seen this happening in my life through past experience. We are in charge of our lives, so now is the time to take charge of it. I hope this gives you inspiration for you to write your own declaration for your life.
I live a simple life. I am free from cluttered spaces, unneeded obligations, and addiction.
My body and mind is clean and clear. I am a conscious being for all, through what I consume; be that purchase, eat, watch, read, and think. I practice conscious parenting.
I find ways to be enlightened. I believe that the truth will set you free. That I am an infinite being who sees my potential and that God loves me. I have abundance. Abundance manifests itself in all aspects of my life.
Everyday I live in gratitude. Love, charity, and harmony are my driving characteristics. I allow only good wholesome and uplifting things in my physical, mental, and spiritual body that promotes health and happiness.
I breathe fresh air, drink clean water, eat fresh living foods, and I am in the sun.
The purpose of my life is to learn self-mastery, to be a leader, and to help others along their journey in life.
I see life as an adventure filled with excitement.
I will seek those that are like-minded throughout the world. People who seek improvement, love, charity, harmony, and adventure.
My words and thoughts are uplifting and build myself and others up. I am a producer, not only a consumer.
I am happy. I feel light and am guided in life through what makes me feel light.
This declaration was inspired by Lou Corona. If interested in writing a declaration yourself, check out his website: http://puradyme.com/lifestyle/declaration/
After I was so blessed to be featured on CNN.com, I should have taken that opportunity and run with it! Unfortunately, it was right in the middle of a hard transition in my life. I have been separated from my spouse for close to 4 months now. Today I sent off my signed papers to my lawyer. Yes, I’m getting a divorce. These last 2 1/2 years has brought a lot of things into my life, not to mention a beautiful daughter who recently turned 1 years old. I have had immense growing experiences, but when it was all said and done, I knew this chapter of my life was over. I won’t go into more detail but the best thing I can do at this point is to not regret. No, I will allow myself to feel the emotions that I feel, when they come, and then ask myself, “what have I learned, what can I learn from this growing experience?”
That being said, I am ready for this new chapter in my life now. I’m ready to come back to my blog. This blog is still about simplifying all parts of my life but I plan to be open, honest, and share my personal growth along my journey of life as it comes. Thank you for all the new people following my blog and thank you for all the kind comments/messages I have received. They are much appreciated! Here’s to the journey, I’m so glad to be able to share this with all of you.
Today I am starting my own Project 333. So what does that mean? It means that I have 33 items (except I’ll be completely honest, it came out to 36 items) in my wardrobe for 3 months. I’ve been wanting to do this for a while, but wanted to wait until Summer was officially here. Why? Because even though I probably don’t own as many clothes as some of my friends, I’m sure my perspective of my wardrobe after these 3 months will be different. I’ll probably get rid of things, and appreciate how blessed I am to have the other items that I haven’t seen for a while. Now this does not include, wedding ring, pajamas, work out clothes, underclothes, and my robe. That being said, I can’t just lounge in yoga pants all day(except for the ones I counted in these items 🙂 ). All other jewelry, purses, etc. counts as an item. For example, I put in one bag, sunglasses, and one pair of earrings. If I purchase something, or realized that I actually need something else more importantly, then I will switch out an item. So where is the rest of my wardrobe? In boxes. I don’t think of myself as very materialistic, but I do think this will be a bit of a challenge for me.